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Archive for "Jan 06 2009"

The Circle Becomes Complete

Obama Wants Journalist Gupta for Surgeon General

President-elect Barack Obama has offered the job of surgeon general to Dr. Sanjay Gupta, the neurosurgeon and correspondent for CNN and CBS, according to two sources with knowledge of the situation.

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I Want my STEVE-TV!

Every time I get barked at about me being an Apple hipster fanboy (even though I’ve rocked with Woz since waaay back in the day), I leisurely lean back on the easiest of retorts when I hear people give Jobs the “He’s just a salesman” bullshit: “When was the last time that Texas dipshit Dell that you love… has even said or ACTUALLY DID anything that rocked your world?”

Image representing Steve Jobs as depicted in C...Image via CrunchBaseIt just ain’t gonna be right without Great God Steve Jobs wielding the whip at the Keynote, especially if this is gonna be the last dance for Apple at Macworld….

One, last, brandishment of The Reality Distortion Field, is needed, especially if this is gonna be the last dance for Apple at Macworld….

“Well, it’s Steve. Steve insists that we’re shipping in early 1982, and won’t accept answers to the contrary. The best way to describe the situation is a term from Star Trek. Steve has a reality distortion field.”

“A what?”

“A reality distortion field. In his presence, reality is malleable. He can convince anyone of practically anything. It wears off when he’s not around, but it makes it hard to have realistic schedules. And there’s a couple of other things you should know about working with Steve.”

“What else?”

“Well, just because he tells you that something is awful or great, it doesn’t necessarily mean he’ll feel that way tomorrow. You have to low-pass filter his input. And then, he’s really funny about ideas. If you tell him a new idea, he’ll usually tell you that he thinks it’s stupid. But then, if he actually likes it, exactly one week later, he’ll come back to you and propose your idea to you, as if he thought of it.”

Steve Jobs, in any comparison, is the greatest CEO there has ever been, or will ever be. If you don’t believe me, just look at what happened once he came back. On any scale, once Jobs returned to Apple in 1997, and brought his NeXT stuff into the mix (finally killing an OS that was growing a grey beard) while also bringing in a designer who has changed the frickin’ paradigm….

Give Jobs a billion dollars’ worth of fruit.

Then pay Woz in candy.

I’m betting he walks out at the end of this year’s keynote, and says, “I ain’t dead yet, and oh yeah, by the way, there’s one more thing we need to tell you about….”

And introduces something insanely great.

Macworld 2009

Like Darth Boss George, there is only One Almighty Jobs:

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Bloggers Ain’t “Tommy,” and this Ain’t ’51

I think ’09 is gonna be a good year,
for bloggers kicking J-Schoolers’ butts.

I think ’09 is gonna be a good year,
where mooks like Mushine get treated like dumbassed, fossilized punks.

Let’s see now, so far, after (the rather old) The Magic Negro crap has been played as some sort of slur against Teh Messiah; before Teh One has even been sworn in, we have a certain amount of chaos surrounding Camp Bambi. “Hope! Change!” has devolved to “let’s bring in more of the Clinton team and a healthy dash of Chicago Style!”

First, for all his calls for “bipartisanship,” Pelosi has made it clear: she’s ramming her own agenda forward without any care what the other side of the aisle, or Barry’s rhetoric, thinks they led us to believe.

Next, the incoming Vice President-elect, Joe Biden, likened the country’s economic crisis to the attacks of 9/11 Monday in a private meeting on Capitol Hill. “We’re at war,” Biden told congressional leaders of both parties during their sit-down with Barack Obama in the Capitol, according to two sources familiar with the exchange.”

Next, Chuckie Cheese wants to sit a Senator who, legally, hasn’t been ordained, while his erstwhile boss is refusing a totally legal appointee the same solicitude, even though, a la Illinois law, he has a better claim to being seated, is Democrat Party denied.

And don’t even get me started on Charlie Rangel.

Gateway: Pelosi Moves to Silence Minority By Erasing Long-Standing House Rules

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