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Niggah? Pleeeze!

Hot Air » Heart-ache: Hasselbeck reduced to tears by dopey N-word discussion

Hasselbeck’s point is a simple one: We all share a common culture, so in the interests of commonality, how about everyone agrees to quit dropping the N-bomb, yes? Whereupon Whoopi, seizing the opportunity for a righteous show of Absolute Moral Authority, duly pitches a fit about how we’re different and that’s the way it is and Elisabeth simply doesn’t understand the “frustration” over the “huge problems that still affect us,” even though, please note, in calling for everyone to stop using the word she’s making the same argument as Jesse Jackson and Al Sharpton.

Consider this a punctuation mark on a week that began with that Obama New Yorker cover, the intent of which was clear but declared to be beside the point because it was unhelpful to the left’s agenda. Whoopi and Sherri Shepherd have a plausible intentionalist defense of their position available to them here — when blacks use the N-word the intent will almost always be innocent whereas it’s much more ambiguous when coming from whites — but that ends up being exploded when Walters asks Shepherd what would happen if she said the word, presumably in a friendly/jokey manner to Sherri. Answer: “I don’t want to hear it come out of your mouth.” So much for intentions.

My best buddy, the dirty, greasy Spic we call “Manuel,” enjoys amping Wife™ by calling Yours Truly, “you dumb nigger Mick,” when we are sitting around, drinking beers, and busting each others balls. She frowns upon such shenanigans, and once admonished Manny, with arms crossed and furrowed brow, declaring “you should not be using that disgusting word, Manuel.”

Manny: “What, ‘Mick’? Motherfucking nigger calls me ‘Spic’ every goddamn day and I can’t hit back?”

Wife™: “That’s not what I’m talking about!”

ME: “She means ‘nigger’, you dumbfucker greaseball.”

Manny: “Oh, bullshit. Honey? It’s just another word for low-rent asshole. Double T is as black as night and I’ve never called him ‘nigger’ because he ain’t as stupid as your husband, so don’t play that white guilt game with me.”

Me: “He’d beat your brains out if you ever said it.”

Wife™: “But… (stewing rage registers in her eyes) IT’S WRONG!”

Me: “Listen to the Rican, sweetie. He is wise. For a greasy fucking half-wop looking, drug dealing asshole, he’s damn near Yoda when his brain manages to kick into gear.”

Manny: “Where is T? We should call that nigger up and get his black ass over here. Your wife’s brain would fucking explode just from listening to how we all say ‘hello’.”

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