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Archive for "Jun 22 2007"

I Need New Dogs

The monsters are approaching uncontrollable. It’s getting to “permanent junkyard employment” or “just shoot the bastards” territory.

Bootz, the beautiful potzer, will of course survive.

I’m thinking “Wolfhounds… big, honking, “six foot five when standing up” Irish Wolfhounds; from that uncle/cousin/whateverthefuck in Ireland, who breeds greyhounds for racing. All it should cost is the freight ticket.

I’d have THREE closely-trained absolute psychos sitting in my yard, almost impervious to pit bulls…

“Yeah, baby, that’s the ticket!”

Of course, Wife™ is gonna totally fucking explode when I launch this ship.

UPDATE: MOM: “He’s gonna charge something like 5 thousand per.”

ME: “I ain’t gonna pay him that kinda bill”

MOM: “So buy local shepherds.”

ME: “His son’s still here on an illegal visa. Like Sean [REDACTED]. I’ll squeeze him.”

MOM: “Don’t you dare!”

ME: “Watch me.”

MOM: “They are your family!”

ME: “They turned their backs to me–and you–when Da died. FUCK EM! FUCK EM TO THE WIND.”

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It’s “Oh Shit” Time in TCville

Gotta change web hosting provider.
Need to find a company that will put up with the likes of Me,
for an acceptable fee;
a company that doesn’t mind having their techies regularly threatened with death by baseball bat and/or near-feral dog. A company that will give me gobs of bandwidth, unlimited MySQL space, a bazillion e-mail addys that will never be used, for mere pennies… with offices close enough to my front door that I can use mass transit to arrive at THEIR front door with said dog and bat in tow….

Yeah, this is gonna be a fucking glorious expedition into the heart of darkness that is the Intarweb’s underbelly.

I’m pretty sure I’m better off getting drunk, now, and THEN start deciding who the hell I’ll be throwing my money at.

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