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Archive for "Mar 23 2005"

Do I Laugh or Cry?

A Bronx teacher who repeatedly flunked his state certification exam paid a formerly homeless man with a developmental disorder $2 to take the test for him, authorities said yesterday.

The illegal stand-in – who looks nothing like teacher Wayne Brightly – not only passed the high-stakes test, he scored so much better than the teacher had previously that the state knew something was wrong, officials said.

read the rest of Schoolhouse crock, then see Dunce of a teacher.

King Rhoid Quits

Bad knee my ass. Ditto the notion of “rehab” and returning to the field. I’m putting money on the table right now and saying he never plays another game.

Madden in the New York Daily News:

Make no mistake, it isn’t just the knee that has Bad Barry singing the blues. It’s the feeling that everything is closing in on him. His lament yesterday – “You guys wanted to hurt me enough, you finally got there….You wanted me to jump off the bridge. I finally have jumped….You wanted to bring me down, you’ve finally brought me down …” – can be interpreted as an admission that he’s finally trapped and the game is about to end.

Bonds can blame his media pals all he wants, but he brought himself down with his arrogance, his deception and his greed. An alleged ex-girlfriend, Kimberly Bell, who is said to have testified to the BALCO grand jury that Bonds told her he was using steroids and gave her $80,000 with instructions as to how to hide it from the IRS, is just the beginning. Soon, Bonds’ associates caught up in the BALCO investigation can also be counted on to flip, rather than go to jail for him.

I’ve been kicking RhoidBoy since, like, forever, but there is a particular level of Hell I want King Rhoid to call home for not following RhoidBoy’s lead and coming clean.

Consider it a prisoner exchange program: Pete Rose gets let out of the hole and into the Hall (there’s a way that mostly won’t upset puritanical numbnuts, and also makes things right with “Shoeless” Joe), and King Rhoid gets shoved in and then lock the goddamn door.

Leave his numbers alone–none of the asterisk shit is necessary. But all his bats and shoes and shirts and images get stripped from the Hall’s walls, and his likeness never gets cast in bronze.

(cross-posted at The Darkside)

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