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Archive for "Mar 17 2005"

NYC’s Irish Kings


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You Dumb Dago Fuck

7:45AM– the phone rings, and the Caller ID says its my ride to Manhattan to get to the parade. I pick up the phone and before I can say “Hello” I hear “Don’t bother getting dressed. We ain’t going. Fuck that son of a bitch Scoppetta; we’re all staying home.” I could almost hear the handset break as he slammed it into the cradle and killed the connection.

Fer Christ’s sake, Nicky, you are one stupid numbnutted fuck of a wop. Bloomie’s gonna be climbing out his plane following his jaunt to Jerusalem and finding himself fucking screwed–have ya heard a Fifth Avenue boo bath, laddie?— and having to do a ton of kissing ass and spending cash because of this bullshit you’ve managed to brew. You damn well may have just cost him Staten Island and a nice chunk of Queens.

Yesterday, I was willing to give you a bit of a pass, with just a backhand kick in your ass. I was ready to write the whole thing off as just you being too dumb to piss and too close to an overly loud Enrico Caruso Victrola disc at an early age, with yer garbage hauling old man’s bullshit haranguing about the shanty corner copper cutting into his number-running action rattling around in yer head, when you were young and stupid and thought Leo Gorcey was the king of the corner in your shitty little world….

But then ya send a half-assed fucker like Chief Hayden out to defend you in the Daily News:

The Fire Department is a paramilitary organization.

No it’s not, you fucking eejit. It’s a cohort willing to die for people they never laid eyes upon; who have to worry about garbage cans filled with shit and bricks being thrown off of roofs in shitbag neighborhoods where they respond to alarms, and still they storm the buildings, when any sane motherfucker would leave the whole thing to burn to the fucking ground.

Its official formation in the St. Patrick’s Day Parade requires all of us who wear the uniform to do so with pride and respect. Over the years, the formation – particularly among those in the Green Beret group – has deteriorated to the point where it has become nothing more than a group of individuals wearing a variety of green berets and an assortment of other adornments, i.e., beads, flowers, buttons and green sunglasses.

Ya never got chosen in the schoolyard games back in the day, didja Petey? Or did the nuns shove their rulers straight up your ass on a regular schedule? Because you sure as shit just bent over in print.

Scoppetta? You just turned into another cheap, gutless political fuck, Nicky, sending your ranking Micko soldier out to take the spears because his boss has neither enough balls or soul to stand up for his own. What I want to know is, who the fuck are you working for? It can’t be that little whelp shit Giffie, and it sure as fuckall ain’t your current boss…. Who’s fucking game is it you’re putting in play?

Hayden, you motherfucking DeValera, you’ll be lucky if you are ever allowed in a 2nd. Avenue bar again. And if some poor dumb immigrant fuck working the door lets you pass the threshold, I pray some Boru just hands your head to you.

His bail will not be a problem. But you, you fucker, for putting your name on that bullshit column…you will set a record, boyo. You will be the only motherfucker ranking officer that the Emerald Society’s bagpipers will rather break their chanters and eat their reeds before playing to ease your soul into the hole.

Obligatory St. Patrick’s Day Post

Fuck him.

Brendan Rules!

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