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Archive for "Feb 07 2005"

Let’s Get the Party Started

All right, football is finally out of the way. Thank you, Patriots, for giving me even more of an impetus to hold Red Sox Nationites in hideous, incontrovertible, near psychopathic contempt–like I didn’t have enough reason this season, after last season’s fucking fiasco of a finish. I’ve spent a good portion of this winter telling anyone and everyone that the real reason the NHL is out on strike is because the owners of the Boston Bruins are viciously dumb bastards in cahoots with the Swedish mafia and the Illuminati….What? What’s this “make sense” business you speak of? I’m telling you, it’s fucking! Boston’s! fault! Oh yeah? Well, then explain that asshole Kerry. See? Boston. They will kill us all if given half a chance.

The graphics are up and the gauntlet is hereby hurled at your feet, meat. I can’t wait for Pitchers & Catchers.
Let’s start the party now. I’m talking about talking some serious smack and if the occasion arises beating shit flat with a baseball bat.

Game on!

PS: I got a nice, crisp, fresh-pressed Benjamin Franklin ready for every Met fan whose rotted corpse is delivered to my front porch; a Benjie for each of the bastards cleared from my sky. I’ll pay double if they are sporting the team’s logo tatooed anywhere on their hide. Red Sox Nation is one thing; anyone openly declaring fealty to the team in Queens needs killing, period. Really. This city is fucked up enough as it is …can you imagine if those bastards start breeding again? We need to whittle that herd down now.

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