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Archive for "Oct 09 2004"

I Got a Chip on My Shoulder

HELLO, ALL YOU RED SOX NATION ASSHOLES
thurmancall.jpg
TIME AGAIN TO SEE IF YOU BOYS GOT THE BALLS TO KNOCK IT OFF.

Strange

Weird ass thing on the visitor list.
If you Google huge gazongas, I come up number three.
From one freaking post.

Hear that LLamas! I blow snot–nay, I mock on your saran wrapped bondage sickos!

You’re Over, Spicoli

So. The guy formerly known as Madonna’s cuckold is pissed that the South Park Boys whacked him in their new flick. Yo, Sean-noodle? Tough guys don’t write memos.

But since you did …

To Trey Parker and Matt Stone,

Dear Fucking Bastards,

I remember a cordial hello when you guys were beginning to be famous guys around Hollywood at some party.

Once, I was cool, and deigned to acknowledge your existence.

I remember several times getting a few giggles out of your humor.

I allowed my baser instincts to reply to your mindless crap.

I remember not being bothered as you traded on my name among others to appear witty, above it all, and likeable to your crowd.

I took it when you ragged on me.

I never mind being of service, in satire and silliness.

I knew I couldn’t sue your ass.

I do mind when anybody who doesn’t have a child, doesn’t have a child at war, or isn’t or won’t be in harm’s way themselves, is encouraging that there’s “no shame in not voting” “if you don’t know what you’re talking about” (Mr. Stone) without mentioning the shame of not knowing what your talking about, and encouraging people to know.

But now I’m so pissed that your making movie dollars by beating my hide that I’m over the coherency borderline

You guys are talented young guys but alas, primarily young guys.

I envy your youth and box office cachet

It’s all well to joke about me or whomever you choose.

I desperately want to sue you. Satire and parody laws suck

Not so well, to encourage irresponsibility that will ultimately lead to the disembowelment, mutilation, exploitation, and death of innocent people throughout the world.

My horse stands fifty-five hands high!

The vote matters to them.

Saddam told me his people loved voting for him!

No one’s ignorance, including a couple of hip cross-dressers, is an excuse.

You guys are a couple of stupid twisted fags!

All best, and a sincere fuck you,
Sean Penn

Nyaah Nyahh!

P.S. Take this as a personal invitation from me to you (you can ask Dennis Miller along for the ride as well) to escort you on a trip, which I took last Christmas. We’ll fly to Amman, Jordan and I’ll ride with you in a (?) 12 hours through the Sunni Triangle into Fallujah and Baghdad and I’ll show you around. When we return, make all the fun you want.

I double dog dare you and anyone who makes fun of me to do something as stupid as the shit I did to get in the papers back in that day.

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